just waiting...

I think waiting has to be the worst part, because you never know what's going to come from all of this, or even if it's worth it. basically no news and the next trial in April which is a long ways away. Ive recently been having some troubles with some asshole bringing up all of this shit from my past it's amazing that some people dont realize there are subjects that you dont bring up, and things you dont make fun of, I cant even fathom the idea that there are that ignorant of people out there but I  guess there are alot of people like that out there and the best thing I or anyone can do is to just learn to deal with it and overcome it just liek everything else.

heres some quotes to help get by...

"The best thing you can do is realize that there is nothing wrong with you, and that it isn't your fault everything around you was the crazy part."

"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no ones definition of your life; define yourself."~Harvey Fierstein

"You decide whether you look at your reality or live pretending these feelings don't exist." -Tori Amos

"YOU are the most important person you know."- courtesy of LceeL

A Book

My mom suggestes i read this book its called Amy and Isabelleby Elizabeth Strout, it was kind of weird it was a book about a girl that went through some of the same stuff i'm going through and about how the mother daughter relationship is completley strained and changed after that, it was really good book, I related to it and Im pretty sure thats why my mom suggested it. I htink she wanted to show me that she doesnt mean to act the way she does but its impossible for relationships not to change after something that big.
its a really good read if your looking for a book in that category others might not like reading about rape situations but its a good book to relate too.
here's an excerpt from the book
 "The real problem, of course, was that she and her mother were together all day. To Amy it seemed as though a black line connected them, nothing bigger than something drawn with a pencil, perhaps, but a line that was always there. Even if one of them left the room, went to the ladies' room or to the water fountain out in the hall, let's say, it didn't matter to the black line; it simply cut through the wall and connected them still. They did the best they could. At least their desks were far apart and didn't face each other."


ooh and trial was postponed to some time in April, pretty far away so who knows what that means. I'll keep all of you readers posted.

another postponment

trial postponed again till Febuary 10th, due to paperwork erroe or something.
does any one know how many times you can postpone? it doesnt seem fair that him and his lawyer can bend things to work for him, and that he just gets to go on as though nothing happened.

Thanks again to Barbara for going to the trial.

just a short little bit of inspiration...

well this friday is another trial lets hope my victim impact statement has left an impact on the judge.

I know I was born and I know that I'll die The in between is mine- from the song I AM MIne by Pearl Jam

im tired of gettin screwed over by people when I open myself up to trust them, imliving for me and for the ones that wont let me down.
found out my mom does have breast cancer :( but they said its very small and treatable let's hope it goes smoothly.
ill keep everyone update about the trial and what not, if any one has any questions or needs some one to talk to about a similar situation feel free to email me at occhopper77@yahoo.com

Updates on the trial.

let's see mailed in my victim impact statement awhile ago, the last trial was on the 8th it was postponed till the 29th due to paperwprk issies or some thing like that. Barbara said that the judge is obviously getting sick of all these excuses and postponents, looks like something may happen soon i'll be sure to keep everyone updated.

The New Year

I'm welcoming the New Year in with open arms, I feel like im over due for a good year( its been over 2 years) I'm ready to make it happen and I'm going to continue fighting untill there is absolutley nothing left I can do.

new years resolution is to continue the changes i've been making
what about you?

merry christmas

So this year has gone by so fast and so many things have happened, I started this blog and I started to find myself again I hope everyone has a Great holiday and a happy new year.

cant wait for the New Year!

24 Hours of a Christmas story all Christmas Eve  family tradition to watch it at least once every christmas